To understand this poem, you may very well need the following glossary.
This work was written as a challenge to me from me, to use the latest slang words as added to the Cambridge Dictionary recently.
Please give me feedback as to how much you liked, it or whether it was all too much of an effort 🤔.
Thank you for your attention and patience 🙏.

Glossary

Delulu – someone who holds unrealistic or overly optimistic beliefs

Solulu – solution

Skibidi – can be good or bad or anything else you want it to be

Trad-wife – traditional homemaker

Mouse Jiggler – a device or piece of software that imitates mouse movements for those who are “working” from home

Work Spouse – a very close working relationship with a colleague.

Taskmasker – possibly my own invention but I don’t want to claim that, but in this context, I am using it in a way to describe someone work shy. However, thinking about it further it could mean someone who is actively trying to deceive

Broligarchy – a portmanteau word from brother and oligarchy which describes a system of power controlled by unelected men

Malding – a portmanteau word of mad and balding which is a slang term in the online gaming community to describe someone who is mad and possibly losing their hair from the frustration of losing bets.

Based – someone who is authentic, independent and strong

Rizz – the ability to charm or seduce
Vibe check – an impromptu check of the mood or atmosphere or energy of a place, individual or group of people

NPCs – Non Player Character is a character in a game that is not controlled by a player

Sigma – someone who is cool confident and self reliant

Beta – a man perceived as weak, passive and lacking confidence

Boss – excellent or cool often used to describe something impressive or someone who handles things well

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The Delulu Charter

Do I think that the earth is flat,
That I only need take a jab and for life not be so fat?
Do I think that vaccines are not worth a jot?
Do I think that there is really a conspiratorial plot?

So tell me who is really delulu,
I think I am the one who has the solulu.
All the corruption and all of the lies,
It is these skibidi people we should really despise.

So whether you are a tradwife or a committed mouse jiggler,
A work spouse or simply a relationship wriggler,
A taskmasker or a really hard worker,
Watch out for the antics of the broligarchy lurker.

They are malding and seething, all stuck in the past,
Calling themselves based but their memes never last.
Their rizz is imaginary, their vibe checks all fail,
They are just NPCs reading from the same tired old tale.

They flex like a sigma but cry like a beta,
Their hot takes are colder than day-old dry pizza
They say they are the solulu, the keepers of truth,
But their logic’s more fragile than the TikTok youth.

So let us not be gaslit by their tradwife delusion,
Their skibidi speeches are pure brain contusion.
The broligarchy rages, but here’s what is true:
They are the final boss battle of being delulu.